By Chris Hyduk

First Aired: September 17th, 1997

Game:Mars Attacks, Kron The Destroyer

Click here to hear this episodes intro!

Memorable Quote: "There's no guardian here..."

This Episode opens with a Bang! The intro itself features some scenes that will get your mind racing...

We find our three heroes in a space shooter-up game, Except this isn't your run-of-the-mill game, it's Mars Attacks! Enzo and Andraia are two Martians in their flying saucer, with Frisket as their co-pilot. (Frisket is nothing more than two eyeballs in a jar!) The User is in a space shuttle which can fire laser beams. Enzo talks to Andraia in the odd Martian language, which consists of nothing but a quacking sound. (Like a duck after inhaling helium!) Enzo decides it's time to end the game, and to stay in the system. They convert their icons to regular format, and finish the game.

One thing is noticibly apparent: They didn't land in Mainframe. They look around the devastated system, and realize that they are being watched. When a group of ragged binomes approaches them, they ask them if they are good Users, or bad Users. Andraia tells them that they are sprites, and the binomes seem relieved, untill Enzo, or Matrix, as he likes to be called, gets startled, and shoots a rubber bicycle horn out from under one of the binomes. The rest run off.

Matrix goes off to see what he can do to repair the system, while Andraia goes to find the Command.com. Matrix locates several tears, and a virus. He immediately goes after the virus, and finds it battling a small sprite, resembling a mechanical boy of some sort...
Matrix leaps onto the virus, which is a giant purple mantis, and points a gun at it's head. The virus seems surprised at seeing a guardian, but Matrix informs him that he is a renegade, right before he blows the virus away. The little boy says that he could have handled it, and that he doesn't need anyone, so Matrix says "fine" and leaves.

Andraia, having found the leader of the system, and nutty old binome (Who's voice sound a lot like Mel Brooks!) The binome offers Matrix and Andraia a bunch of goods to stay on as defenders of the system (Including a NERF gun, except the logo says "NERD"!) They decline, but offer to train some people to help win the games, as they discovered that one more loss would destroy the system. Matrix puts on an act, which they have obviously done many times before, to get people to vollenteer. It works, and they get four binomes. One named Barry, who can run really fast, another is Gabby, who wants to write a book about Andraia, the third is Hardboot, a construction worker who couldn't think of a better name, and finally, Jeff, a nerdy little guy, who isn't even sure why he's there.

Shortly after, a game cube lands, and they prepare. Suddenly, the kid comes running out of nowhere, and leaps at Matrix in a familiar fashion, only to crash into Matrix and fall to the ground. Once in the game, they find out that they must retrieve an object called "The Golden tooth of SysOp". They reboot, and Andraia becomes Xena, Warrior Princess, and Matrix becomes Braveheart. Matrix gives them all codenames, Barry becomes Overdrive, Gabby becomes Tweak, Hardboot becomes...well...Hardboot, and Jeff becomes Tactic. The kid wants a name to, but Matrix just tells him to get lost, and that he's getting his Backup. "Backup...Cool!" says the kid, and he adopts the name.

They begin to walk, and as they do, noone notices a giant bird snatch up Backup and carry him away. They make it to a boat, and Overdrive says he'll cut the chains. He starts to chop away, but to no avail (Although this fact doesn't seem to slow him down). Andraia dives into the water, and uses her spines on a large monster that was threatening them. They use it to cross the swamp, but Matrix goes off to look for Backup.

He finds him hanging from a grate, above what looks like certain death. He is rescued at the last second by Matrix, who really like he could care less about what happens to him. They fight their way through a couple gargoyles, and head off to meet the rest of the guys.
Andraia's group, meanwhile, has managed to get the drawbridge down, with some magic from Tactic, he flys up and opens the door. Inside, they marvel at how they have gotten so far without encountering the User. As if on cue, he shows up, and starts a charge. The binomes try to pry open the mouth of Kron, who they accidentally closed, and they hold off the user by throwing skulls at his head. they eventually knock him out, and Matrix and Andraia revert their icons to Gamesprite format. They say their goodbyes, and Matrix gives his Yo-yo to Backup, his last remnant of his childhood.
When the game leaves, we see the inhabitants of the system planning on how they will rebuild, and start again.


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